day in the life
Highlighting
the everyday life of a couple living well with a slow-growing cancer.
Life isn’t
always easy, and there will certainly be sorrows and losses
along the way. But being alive is good. It is very good.
|
Friday, January 30, 2009
Leaving on a jet plane
Gary had his bone
scan yesterday, CT scan today, and an appointment has been set
for February 13 in Eugene to learn results and next steps.
No time to write more. Gary will be home in less than an hour to
take me to the airport. I'm on my way to New Jersey to visit the
munchkins and their parents! The only thing that would make it
better is if Gary could come with.
Photos to be posted upon return!
Comment
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Scans ordered
It’s the
perfect snowy white day – 18 degrees out – which invites
hunkering down near the fireplace with orange spice tea, a lit
candle that smells like toasted hazelnut and a good Miss Marple
mystery.
I’ve torn
myself away from the fireplace for just a few minutes to post an
update on rising PSA counts. Gary normally has a blood test to
measure his PSA (prostate specific antigen) every 4 months.
PSA is often elevated in the presence of prostate cancer –
Gary’s was 44 when he was diagnosed.
With the introduction of hormone therapy treatments, Gary’s
count went down into the
zeroes. It’s still low – 0.32 – but has risen three times
in the last 4 PSA tests, the most recent rising being a week
ago.
Dr. E’s
office called on Friday to let Gary know they wanted to do CT
and bone scans … and where would he like them done. Apparently
if they detect any cancer in either of these two scans, they can
radiate just those areas.
We should
probably have scan results by the end of the week. Meanwhile,
Gary is the picture of health, just come indoors with slightly
red cheeks from shoveling snow. And hinting for something
chocolate.
|
So I’ll postpone my cozy chair
by the fire for a little while longer and bake some
Chewy Brownies because
I love to bake ... because chocolate cures a world
of ills ... because Gary’s worth it!
Comment |
 |
|
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Welcome to life
I’m reading a
book by Peggy Noonan entitled John Paul the Great … not
because I’m Catholic or particularly interested in the pope, but
because I enjoy Peggy Noonan’s writing (in her former life, she
was President Reagan's speech writer and now she writes for the
Wall Street Journal).
In her book
on the pope, Noonan includes an essay she wrote back in 2002
about Karen Hughes, a Bush advisor who had just announced her
resignation. Noonan entitled her essay “Back to Life”, and it
started with these words:
“What is
life? It is the nice big thing you enter each morning when the
alarm goes off and you put your feet on the cool floor and then
stand, with your hands on the bottom of your back, and look out
the window.
“Life is
putting on coffee, picking up the newspaper … You can watch the
news and be interested like a normal person by what’s going on,
as opposed to being interested like an abnormal person—a person
who works for a president, say.”
Noonan’s
essay goes on to talk about the simple pleasures of a normal
life and hooray for Karen Hughes for recognizing that life could
be more than the back-stabbing, high pressure, political world
she had just resigned from. No shame there.
So what would
I have done today if I could have resigned my job? I would have
taken longer to write in my journal this morning. I would have
gone to visit my lovely 70-something-year-old friend, Barbara,
who recently fell and broke her hip. I would have worked on
grant-writing, maybe picked up my knitting project, browsed
through recipes and then walked to the store for ingredients to
try a new recipe for dinner.
Ironically,
these are the types of things I did for years – back when I was
a stay-at-home mom and had time for sewing quilts and planting
vegetables and making strawberry jam. I didn’t mean to take it
for granted – this privilege of being around when our kids were
there, of doing the wonderful home-making thing full-time.
|
|
|
Funny how sometimes we have to lose something to
appreciate it. I don't want it to be that way, which
is why I’m appreciating the life I have today.
Today I went to work in a pleasant environment. At
this very moment my best friend and husband is
sitting across the dining table from me. Our home is
warm, our bed is soft, there’s a vehicle parked in
our |
garage and
one out on the street, and my stomach is filled from dinner.
One of my
sisters-in-law gave me a plaque a while back that reads, “There
is always, always, always something to be thankful for.”
Today I choose thankfulness.
Comment
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Insane residents
Our home town
of Bend, Oregon, has more than its fair share of insanely active
residents. (Of course it helps that within a short distance of
town there are mountains to ski; river rapids to navigate; cliff
walls to rappel; trails for hiking, biking, horseback riding;
and numerous lakes to explore.)
|
This morning, with the temperature at 22 degrees, we
walked the trail that follows the Deschutes River
within city limits. I predicted there would be five
other cars parked along the river, five other
individuals or couples that were just as crazy as we
were to be out in the freezing fog (pictured at
right as it accumulates on the bare branches). |
|
But I was
wrong. We passed well over a dozen people along the trail –
including a couple we knew from the local cancer community. And
that doesn’t count the people we saw in the park. And several of
them were jogging. How crazy is that?!
| |
|
And then we came upon this fellow (at left) standing
in the shallow part of the river just a few feet
from the trail.
I
love this town with its river and up-close mountain
views and its crazy citizens – the feathery and the
human kind – who brave 22 degree temperatures to
enjoy the great outdoors. |
Comment
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Back in high
school
I had
forgotten how much I enjoy being around teenagers. A few years
back, I was on staff at a boarding high school that hosted teens
from across the country and around the world. I loved it. And I
love that we’ve been able to keep in touch with so many of them
via cell phone, email and Facebook.
This Thursday
and Friday we were back in high school. We presented a modified
version of our cancer team presentation in three different
health classes – emphasis on attitudes and choices that
determine quality of life when challenging things happen.
The classes
were each an hour and a half so there was plenty of time for
interaction. We warned the students there would be a quiz after
the presentation – important stuff like, “What is the name of
our grandson?” and “What was the scientific study that Gary
conducted?”
Summit
High freshman (+ 2 sophomores) health class
I’m not sure
if I’m allowed to say this, but the freshman class was my
favorite. So full of enthusiasm and hope. Amazingly attentive.
During the Q&A there were always several hands in the air –
Me, me, pick me! (Of course it helped that we threw Hershey’s kisses
for every intelligent question they asked.)
And actually
there were lots of really great questions from all three
classes: “How did your children take the news?” … “How has it
affected your life?” … “Why do you say, ‘We have cancer’?” … “Do
you appreciate life more now?”
Our hats are
off to Mr. Turnbull, most excellent health teacher and track
coach at Summit High. To manage classes of nearly 40 students
each on a daily basis and bring home state track trophies gets
our full respect.
Side note: I
asked the students, “Do you have to join track to get an “A” in
this class?” They said no, but Mr. Turnbull said, “It helps!”
;)
Comment
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Engaged crowd
I’m thinking
that traditional support groups are going by the wayside – you
know, the kind where people sit around in a circle and talk
about their cancer woes.
We were guest
speakers at a prostate cancer support group last night at the
Oregon Urology Institute (OUI) in Springfield. The young,
vibrant social worker, Stephanie, who started the group just a
couple months ago, is averaging 15-20 attendees at each meeting.
I think the
reason is because she has managed to transform a storage area in
their new radiation facilities into a safe space with
refreshments, an opening half hour social time and a guest
speaker – usually one of the OUI physicians.
Food,
fellowship and good information. What more could you ask for in
a support group?!
We gave our
20-minute survivorship talk, fielded a couple of questions, and
then Dr. Bodell, urologist, stood to answer medical questions.
The crowd was very engaged. After being dismissed, most of them
hung around.
We've often
said how critical it was for us to connect with people within
the cancer community. But it's got to be the right connection. I
think it's important and inspiring to see other survivors living
well. And that's what's going on in Springfield, Oregon. Good
job,
Stephanie!
Comment
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Out of the
mouths of babes
I’m sitting
in Barnes & Noble with my laptop and my sweetie (well, actually
my laptop is here with me and my sweetie is wandering the book
aisles). A little girl
with the
biggest brown eyes -
probably around 3 years old - was having a discussion with her
mom about how the McDonald's restaurant across the street didn't
look like it had been cleaned.
As they
passed my table, the little girl looked at me and said, "Hi."
And then she announced, "McDonalds are dirty."
I smiled and
said, “Well thank you for telling me. I won’t go there today.”
And then a twinge of pain hit my heart at not having a
3-year-old (or any age) grandchild nearby.
Back in the
day when we lived in the same hemisphere with our grandkidlets,
I made it a habit to write down some of the
things they said.
| |
|
I was helping Lilly, age 3, use the big-person potty when
she asked me to close the bathroom door. “I need
some piracy,” she explained.
Titus, very much into rhyming at age 3, was helping me bake
cookies one day. When we got to the cinnamon, he
said, “Hey … cimanems and M&M’s. That rhymes!” |
Yep ... sure
does,
you brilliant, handsome, clever boy!
Comment
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Divine
intervention
It’s a gorgeous wet, windy day
with piles of snow still refusing to melt. I’m on my second cup
of tea and there’s a fire burning cheerily in the fireplace.
I’ve been reading through Andy Stanley’s book Visioneering
again, and came across a comment that jolted me: “I think it is
safe to assume that most Christians are not attempting anything
that requires God’s intervention.”
Why is that? Is it because when we are younger with our
conquer-the-world
attitude we have dreams … and in time, as things don’t
happen the way we envision, we lower our standards so we don’t
feel like failures?
I was thinking back at what has transpired for us in 2008 in
terms of our Cancer Adventures vision. There are several things
that you would definitely say happened because of divine
intervention
– the various speaking opportunities in Idaho and Oregon, the
publishing of our book, and 501(c)3 paperwork submitted with
stellar board members in place.
And then
there are the 2009 speaking opportunities already lined up, some
of them that just came out of the blue (divine intervention):
-
Oregon
Urology Institute – January
-
Summit
High School health classes
– January
-
Stupid
Cancer Show (NYC) interview
–
February
-
26th
Annual Radiation Oncology Seminar (Portland) – February
-
Invitation to tell our story as part of a sermon series,
“Live as if you’re dying"
-
Book-signing opportunity at a CHAIN Fund event (Atlanta) –
May
-
Joint NIH/Chordoma
Foundation survivorship event (Bethesda) – June or July
I’ve always thought—overly-positive person that I’ve been
accused of being—that God wants his children to envision larger
things than is possible for us to accomplish without his help.
Because then when God divinely intervenes, he gets the honor
deserving his deity.
Here’s to anticipating more divine intervention in 2009!
Comment
|
